Nobody laugh or feel weird, I just don't write about these things alot. Or maybe I do.
Seeing the horizon makes me cry.
It makes me feel infinite cos it's somewhat like looking down on Earth and then off into the rest of the universe. Or because I feel that the world, life, and everything in between is not overwhelming at all... Look it's the horizon and I can see the edge of the world. Only there is no edge. At the same time, there's this sinking feeling I get from realizing that it's not overwhelming at all... Oh look it's the horizon, the world doesn't stretch on and on after all.
I'm just a speck, an invisible dot if you look at this sphere from outerspace but suddenly I feel claustrophobic, like the world is too small, twenty-four hours is too short, this lifetime isn't long enough, a hundred thousand years isn't long ago. At all. Cos my genes still recall all that lived before it, yes, even a hundred thousand years ago. And starlight that illuminates this night, it's even older. And then, again, I feel that this lifetime isn't long enough. I feel it a hundred times over. I'm not even at the end yet and I already feel like a life. Time. Is. Not. Long enough.
And how much of my less than a hundred years of consciousness do I spend eating? Staring at the computer? Talking nonsense? Making mistakes? Laughing at other people? At myself? With my friends? Spreading love? Loving? Love? For some I spend too much time, some too little. How about feeling infinite? I wish I always felt infinite. (But then it'd start becoming less special, less empowering, huh?)
I'm not even near the end yet somehow I know this life is short. I'm not even near the end yet somehow I know that we expire all too soon. But at the same time, the very reason why I feel infinite is because the end isn't here yet.
Is the end even gonna come? Why is it taking so long? And I say this just because I feel infinite. But I know that life is short.
I know, I know, I know.
I don't know a lot of things but that, I know.
See the horizon? It's beautiful.
It makes me feel infinite cos it's somewhat like looking down on Earth and then off into the rest of the universe. Or because I feel that the world, life, and everything in between is not overwhelming at all... Look it's the horizon and I can see the edge of the world. Only there is no edge. At the same time, there's this sinking feeling I get from realizing that it's not overwhelming at all... Oh look it's the horizon, the world doesn't stretch on and on after all.
I'm just a speck, an invisible dot if you look at this sphere from outerspace but suddenly I feel claustrophobic, like the world is too small, twenty-four hours is too short, this lifetime isn't long enough, a hundred thousand years isn't long ago. At all. Cos my genes still recall all that lived before it, yes, even a hundred thousand years ago. And starlight that illuminates this night, it's even older. And then, again, I feel that this lifetime isn't long enough. I feel it a hundred times over. I'm not even at the end yet and I already feel like a life. Time. Is. Not. Long enough.
And how much of my less than a hundred years of consciousness do I spend eating? Staring at the computer? Talking nonsense? Making mistakes? Laughing at other people? At myself? With my friends? Spreading love? Loving? Love? For some I spend too much time, some too little. How about feeling infinite? I wish I always felt infinite. (But then it'd start becoming less special, less empowering, huh?)
I'm not even near the end yet somehow I know this life is short. I'm not even near the end yet somehow I know that we expire all too soon. But at the same time, the very reason why I feel infinite is because the end isn't here yet.
Is the end even gonna come? Why is it taking so long? And I say this just because I feel infinite. But I know that life is short.
I know, I know, I know.
I don't know a lot of things but that, I know.
See the horizon? It's beautiful.
posted by Byeong | 10:14:00 PM
3 Comments:
Waaaaah please do, please do. I want Memento. And RUn Lola Run yeah.
I'll give you a copy of first episode of Prison Break tomorrow.
I feel like dying when I see the horizon..or wish I was dying so I have the reserve to cry :D
I feel like dying when I see the horizon..or wish I was dying so I have the reserve to cry :D
Post a Comment
<< Home